English Jokes You will not be bored with us!

An English teacher asked her class to write an essay on what they’d do if they had a million dollars. Alec handed in a blank sheet of paper. ‘Alec ! yelled the teacher, ‘you’ve done nothing. Why?’ ‘Because if I had a million dollars, that’s exactly what I would do …

Little Johnny was crying one day, and his dad asked him why. ‘I’ve lost five cents,’ sobbed Johnny. ‘Don’t worry,’ said his dad kindly. Here’s five more for you,’ At this Johnny howled louder than ever. ‘Now what is it ?’ asked his dad. ‘I wish I’d said I’d lost …

William: May I have some money for the man crying outside ? Mum: What crying man ? William: The one that’s crying, ‘Ice cream! Ice Cream !

Johnny collected lots of money from trick or treating and he went to the candy store to buy some chocolate. ‘ You should give that money to charity,’ said the shopkeeper. ‘No, I’ll buy the chocolate. You give the money to charity!

Ted said to his friend, ‘can you lend me $10?’ ‘But I only have $8,’ his friend replied. That’s OK, you can always owe me the other $2!

If you found a five dollar bill in every pocket of your coat, what would you have ? Someone else’s coat.

A little monster was learning to play the violin,’ I’m good, aren’t I?’ he asked his big brother. ‘You should be on the radio,’ said his brother. ‘You think I’m that good?’ ‘No, I think you’re terrible, but if you were on the radio, I could switch you off !

Why did your sister feed money to her cow ? Because she wanted to get rich milk.

My sister fell in love at second sight. When she first met him she didn’t know how rich he was.

‘Five dollars for one question! said the girl to the fortune-teller. ‘That’s very expensive,isn’t it ?’ ‘Next!