Yo’ Mama is so fat, she has to use a telephone pole as a tampon.

I like stupid questions. Some guy’s looking at this picture of me with no beard. Then he looks at me and goes, ‘You grow a beard?’ No, I shave my photos.

Yo’ Mama’s teeth are so rotten, her smile looks like candy corn.

Yo’ Mama is so fat, the telephone company gave her two area codes.

Yo’ Mama’s teeth are so yellow, I can’t believe it’s not butter.

Yo’ Mama is so fat, she has a tattoo of the United States on her chest — actual size.

It’s never sincere. There’s always like a sarcastic subtext to it, you know? Like, what he’s really saying is, ‘What do you need, man who I would never in life consider having as a swim buddy?’ ‘What’ll it be, guy who’s probably terrible at every sport?’ ‘Can I help you, …

Yo’ Mama’s house is so dirty, the roaches ride around in ATVs.

Yo’ Mama is so fat, when she goes to the beach, she’s the only one who gets a tan.

You’re like school in the summertime — no class.