One night as a bartender is closing up his bar, he hears a knock at the back door. When he opens the door, there stands a bum who asks, “Can I have a toothpick?”The bartender gives him a toothpick and continues cleaning up his bar. Five minutes later, he hears …
Přečíst celý »Měsíční archivy: July 2016
Two Spoons
At a restaurant, one of the customers notices that all of the waiters have two spoons in their vest pockets. A waiter explains, “We see that the most frequently dropped silverware is spoons, therefore we keep them for replacement.”Then the customer notices a string hanging out of all the waiters’ …
Přečíst celý »Two Old Ladies
Two old ladies are at the movies. “Psst,” says one old lady. “I think the guy next to me is beating off.” “What makes you say that?” “He’s using my hand.”
Přečíst celý »Two Guns Gonzales
A man walks into a bar one day and asks the bartender if he knows a man named Two Guns Gonzales. The bartender says no but he tells him that the man in the back named No Guns knows him. So the guy walks to the back of the bar …
Přečíst celý »Two Gay Men and a Shower
Two gay men, Paul and Tom, were making love one night, and had just finished when Paul decided he was going to freshen up in the shower. Tom was laying there thinking about how wonderful Paul was, when he decided he was going to join him in the shower. When …
Přečíst celý »Two Boots
A woman walks into a saloon and stands on a chair. “Fellas! My p***y is so big that I’ll give $100 to anyone who has something that I can’t take.” A big cowboy gets up and takes off his size 16 cowboy boots and shoves them into her p***y. The …
Přečíst celý »Twisted Baby Joke
What is more fun that stapeling babies to a wall? Ripping them off.
Přečíst celý »Trucker Runs
A hitchhiker walks down the road. Unfortunately, he has the runs and has to stop every 15 minutes. A truck driver stops and offers a ride, but warns him that he won’t stop for anything.About 10 minutes on the road, the hitchhiker begs the truck driver to stop, and the …
Přečíst celý »Troubled Man
A guy has a bad habit: He loves to hit pedestrians while he drives. So one day he’s driving andsees an old lady with a cane and he decides to control his urge to swerve and hit her — but he can’t. Later, he sees a kid skating and can’t …
Přečíst celý »Tough Ass
What is tougher than a pitbull with AIDS? The guy who gave it to him.
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