I got a hangover. I’m stupid. I went out last night, and I started out the night shooting tequila, then for some dumb reason, I switched over to Goldschlager. Woke up this morning and pooped a Mexican coin.
Přečíst celý »Měsíční archivy: July 2016
Rebecca Corry: I Miss Being a Kid
I really miss being a kid. Sometimes I’ll poop my pants to remember what it’s like.
Přečíst celý »Raggedy Ann and the Pillsbury Doughboy
Q: What do you get when you put Raggedy Ann and the Pillsbury Doughboy together?A: A redhead with a yeast infection.
Přečíst celý »Prune Pizza
What do you get when you eat a prune pizza? Pizzeria!
Přečíst celý »Proctology, For Fun & Profit
What kind of a car does a proctologist drive? A brown Probe!
Přečíst celý »Pretty Hair
A guy admired the hair of three girls. He walked by one and asked, “How’d you get such lovely blonde hair” Taking her hand and gently running it through her hair, the girl answered, “It’s natural.” The guy walked by the second girl and asked, “How’d you get such pretty …
Přečíst celý »Poor Fly
Q: What went through the fly’s mind as he hit the windshield? A: His butt.
Přečíst celý »Plumber’s Job
Q: What does a plumber need to know about his job?A: Sh*t runs downhill and payday is on Friday.
Přečíst celý »Paul Nardizzi: Not Cutting the Umbilical
I’m not gonna cut the cord. I mean, babies get mixed up or even stolen from hospitals all the time. This is obviously the best way to prevent it. What better way to prove it’s your kid than to make sure it’s still connected to you? Believe me, I raised …
Přečíst celý »Pantyhose
Q: How can you tell if a woman is wearing pantyhose?A: Her ankles swell up when she farts.
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