Why don’t you come over to my oil drum fire? I make a mean plate of boiled shoe leather.

Your boxcar or mine?

I lived in your neighborhood before it became gentrified.

Want to go back to my place and listen to this band before they sell out?

That sport jacket totally matches your sneakers.

Can I come over and judge you by the books on your shelf?

Haven’t I seen that ironic t-shirt somewhere before?

Wow, your t-shirt is even more ironic than mine!

Want to come over and be bored at my place?

Can I buy you an ironically lowbrow beer?