Why does a woman pierce her belly button? So she can hang an air freshner from it.

Ted and Julie go to bed with each other for the first time. Julie: “I should warn you, Ted: I’ve got acute angina.” Ted: “Your breasts aren’t bad either.”

Q: What do you call the space between Pamela Anderson’s breasts? A: Silicon Valley.

A little boy and a little girl are in the bathtub together. The little girl looks down at the boy and asks, “Can I touch it?” He answers, “No way — you already broke yours off!”

Q: Why did the chicken cross the basketball court? A: He heard the ref was blowing fowls.

I sent away for a penis enlarger. They sent me back a magnifying glass.

Q: What does sex have in common with a savings account? A: You lose interest once you make a withdrawal.

A man comes home from work to find his wife sliding down the banister. “What are you doing?” he asks. She answers, “Warming up your dinner.”

Q: What has 75 balls and screws old ladies? A: Bingo.

Clem pulled over the car by the side of the road and showed Jed where he’d first had sex. “It was right down there by that tree. I remember the day plainly. It was a warm summer day. She and I were so much in love. We walked down to …