Rigby drove into the city with his girl to catch their first play at a theater. Rigby rushed up to the box office and said, “Gimme two tickets for tonight’s show.” “Sorry,” said the box office attendant. “There are no seats left. We have only two standing rooms left.” “Well, …
Přečíst celý »Měsíční archivy: July 2016
Tyfus applied for a job in a factory.
Tyfus applied for a job in a factory. The company doctor who was giving him a physical asked, “Have your eyes ever been checked?” “No,” said the worker. “They’ve always been brown.”
Přečíst celý »Chaffee
Chaffee could talk on any subject whether he knew anything about it or not. Mostly he didn’t. One day his neighbor Nibley could stand no more. “Do you realize,” asked Nibley, “that you and I know all there is to be known?” “Do you really think so?” said Chaffee. “How …
Přečíst celý »Wyatt, Milford and Calhoun were
Wyatt, Milford and Calhoun were standing one on top of the other trying to measure a flag pole. A man passing by yelled up to them, “Why don’t you guys just take down the pole, lay it down on the ground and measure it?” “We don’t wanna measure the length, …
Přečíst celý »Shingles were loose on Pennock’s roof,
Shingles were loose on Pennock’s roof, and he complained about leaks to Barton, his neighbor. “Why don’t you mend the roof?” asked Barton. “I can’t today,” Pennock replied. “It’s pouring rain.” “Well, why don’t you patch it in dry weather.” “It don’t leak then!”
Přečíst celý »An army sergeant told Private Perkins
An army sergeant told Private Perkins to go to the end of the line. He did, but then returned. “I thought I told you to go to the end of the line,” barked the NCO. “Why did you come back?” “Because there’s already somebody there!”
Přečíst celý »Henderson bought a new
Henderson bought a new car and, after he left the showroom, decided to catch a movie. When he came out, Henderson noticed he’d locked the car and left the keys in the ignition. He telephoned the dealer. “Which is the cheapest window to break?” he asked. “You don’t have to …
Přečíst celý »Did you hear about the dumb
Did you hear about the dumb father who returned from lunch and saw a sign on his door, “Back in 30 minutes,” so he sat down to wait for himself?’
Přečíst celý »Two Canadian guys, Mike and Rob were on
Two Canadian guys, Mike and Rob were on the roof, laying tile, when a sudden gust of wind came and knocked down their ladder. “I have an idea,” said Mike. “We’ll throw you down, and then you can pick up the ladder.” “What, do you think I’m stupid? I have …
Přečíst celý »The Albanian planted lightbulbs in
The Albanian planted lightbulbs in his garden. He heard that tulips grew from bulbs.
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