How come you can’t find lawyers sunbathing on the beach? Cats keep covering them over with sand.

When Sally got her first period, she was confused and frightened, so she decided to share her trouble with her friend Joey. Sally told Joey what was happeing, but he didn’t quite understand, so she showed him her problem. Joey said, “I’m no doctor, but it looks like someone ripped …

Growing up, I never thought it was a big deal having two white parents. But now I feel like I have to give them credit because they adopted me back in the 70s, when it was still a little dangerous to have the ethnic kid. ‘Cause this is before ‘Diff’rent …

Never give up, because your dreams can come true. Take me, for example: when I was a kid, I really wanted to be invisible. So then, I grew up, and I moved to L.A.

My mom’s a teacher, so she was real strict with me and my brother. She was like, ‘Look, don’t drink and don’t do drugs and don’t sleep around.’ And then, one day it was like she changed her mind about everything. She said, ‘You’re going to college.’

If you look in your high school yearbook, it’s so great ’cause the stuff people wrote in there — very sincere. I want to call people based on what they wrote in my yearbook. Like, I haven’t talked to them since, just call ’em up: ‘Hey Susan, what’s going on? …

He was in a wheelchair, kind of a troubled kid. He’d roll away from home all the time.

I got left back in 5th grade so many times, I drove the rest of the class to school with me.

Questions and answers selected from tests in Springdale, Arkansas in 2000 to 16 year old students! (Don’t laugh too hard – one of these may be the president someday.) Q: Name the four seasons. A: Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar. Q: Explain one of the processes by which water can …

My mama would whip my butt so bad in the grocery store, they would announce it on the speakers.