What do you call a vegetarian with diarrhea? A salad shooter.

A few days before his proctological exam, a one eyed man accidentally swallowed his glass eye. He was worried for a while, but there were no ill effects, so he forgot about it. Once he was in the doctor’s office, the man followed instructions, undressed, and bent over. The first …

How does herpes leave the hospital? On crotches.

Q: What do you get when you mix holy water with castor oil?A: A religious movement.

Q: What do you call someone who doesn’t fart in public? A: A private tooter.

What’s gross? Farting in the bathtub. What’s grosser than that? Catching the bubbles with your teeth.

Once there was a liitle boy in church. He had to go to the bathroom so he told his mother, ”Mommy, I have to piss.” The mother said, ”Son don’t say piss in church. Next time you have to piss, say, ‘whisper’ because it is more polite. The next Sunday, …

What do you buy a dead baby for its birthday? A dead puppy!

What does a skeleton say when he wants to eat? Bone appetit!

I’m trying to scare up a piece of ass as my Dad would say. Piece of ass is always a strange thing to hear guys call a woman. Piece of ass? Piece of ass sounds like something an FBI agent finds in a field.