Yo’ Mama is so ugly, her vibrator went soft.

Q: What do rocks and women have in common?A: Men skip them when they’re flat.

Yo’ Mama is so fat, when she gets her shoes shined, she has to take the shoeshine boy’s word for it.

Yo’ Mama is so ugly, she not only got hit with the ugly stick, she must have got lost in an ugly forest.

They do have weird ads. That one with the mother and daughter on the beach — ‘Mom, why do they have douche?’ Why don’t you ask the pelicans that are following you?

Yo’ Mama is so fat, she has shocks on her toilet.

Yo’ Mama is so ugly, when she was born, the doctors thought the placenta was her twin.

Here’s the worst moment on the phone — somebody calls you with a wrong number; then they call you back again to verify their stupidity. They should have special equipment for this: retard redial.

Yo’ Mama is so fat, her shadow is used for the witness protection program.

Yo’ Mama is so ugly, the only thing she turns on is the TV.