Yo’ Mama is so fat, she tried to jump rope and knocked the Earth out of orbit.

Yo’ Mama is so ugly, yo’ daddy takes her to work with him so he doesn’t have to kiss her goodbye.

Yo’ Mama is so ugly, I asked if her face hurt because it was killing me.

He’s real old. Matter of fact, he had a prostate check — they found an arrow head in there last week. Pretty nervous about it. He’s going to the archaeologist next week.

Yo’ Mama is so fat, the tag on her dress reads, “Made in Hungary, Turkey, China, U.S.A., Algeria, Japan, and Indonesia.”

I am pretty sure that Eskimos are just freeze dried Navajos.

I can do some things now that I couldn’t do when I was 17, like date high school girls.

Yo’ Mama is so fat, when she dances, the band skips.

You don’t get a body like this overnight. It takes years of neglect.

I love Satan. Well, I don’t love Satan; I respect him. He always wears black and silver, silver and black. Anybody who can accessorize in that kind of heat — that’s really terrific.