Fred: Do you think I’m a fool? Harry: No. But what’s my opinion against thousands of others?’

A man went into a pet shop to buy a parrot. He was shown an especially fine one which he liked the look of, but he was puzzled by the two strings which were tied to its feet. “What are they for?” he asked the pet shop manager. “Ah well, …

How does an idiot call for his dog? He puts two fingers in his mouth and then shouts Rover.

Did you hear about the village idiot buying bird seed? He said he wanted to grow some birds.

I can’t understand the critics saying that only an idiot would like that television program. I really enjoyed it.

What do you get when you cross an idiot with a watch? A cuckoo clock.

Why did the idiot plant nickels in his garden? He wanted to raise some hard cash.

Two men were knocking in nails to the sides of a house, one of them kept throwing them away. “Why do you keep throwing nails away” said the other. “Because they have the point at the wrong end”, he replied “You fool, we could use those on the other side …

What did the stupid ghost do? He used to climb over walls.

What do you call a stupid skeleton? Bonehead.