Not like these wimpy bumper cars they have now with padding, seat belts and air bags. Back then, it was just metal, that’s it. It was like sitting in a wheelbarrow. If you got hit, man, there was some permanent damage.
Přečíst celý »Things Children Have Learned
No matter how hard you try, you can’t baptize cats. When your Mom is mad at your dad, don’t let her brush your hair. If your sister hits you, don’t hit her back. They always catch the second person. Never ask your 3-year old brother to hold a tomato. You …
Přečíst celý »Johnny Sanchez: Bored as a Kid
When you’re a kid, man, you just started doing something — it was fun… Remember you’d be in the other room, bored, complete burnout time: ‘Man, I’m bored, man.’ You just make something up. It was just great. ‘Alright, I’m gonna run in the kitchen, touch the refrigerator and come …
Přečíst celý »They’re Busy
One day, the phone rang, and a little boy answered. “May I speak to your parents?” “They’re busy.” “Oh. Is anybody else there?” “The police.” “Can I speak to them?” “They’re busy.” “Oh. Is anybody else there?” “The firemen.” “Can I speak to them?” “They’re busy.” “So let me get …
Přečíst celý »Johnny Sanchez: Bad Attitudes
Kids — like the new generation right now — these kids, right, they got attitudes. They’re so young, all of them, they got that hip hop attitude, even though they’re like white, Asian, black, Latino, doesn’t matter right… ‘Billy, come and eat!’ ‘Man, shut up, Mom. Shut up, I’m talking …
Přečíst celý »There was a little girl named Fufu …
There was a little girl named Fufu. She went to school one day and her teacher said, “How do you spell your name?” The girl replied, “F.U. – F.U.” Her teacher sent her to the principal’s office. She got to the principal’s office and he said, “First off, how do …
Přečíst celý »John Mendoza: Hitchcock’s “The Birds”
My all-time favorite movie was the Alfred Hitchcock movie, ‘The Birds.’ I saw it with my older brother. We get home that night — I went to bed; he opened up all the windows and poured croutons on me.
Přečíst celý »The Twinkie Joke
A 14-year-old girl walks into a hairdresser’s shop with a Twinkie in her hand. She sits on the seat and the barber puts the plastic cover on her. As he is cutting her hair, she takes out her Twinkie and starts to eat it, not realizing that her cut hair …
Přečíst celý »John Bush: Growing Up in Minnesota
People are like, ‘What, Minnesota — igloos, hicks, right?’ I try to defend it, that it’s cool and stuff, but I know that when I was in junior high and we would see a limo, we were like, ‘That’s Prince. That’s gotta be Prince.’
Přečíst celý »Joey Vega: Old School Slides
When I was a kid, the slide was four stories high and you had to climb up like a fireman. And you always bumped your shin on that last rung. And that slide — it was metal sitting in the sun for nine days. There was no nighttime when I …
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