Why won’t sharks attack lawyers? Professional courtesy.
Přečíst celý »Seagull’s Final Resting Place
A four-year-old boy and his father went to the beach. There was a dead seagull lying on the sand. The boy asked his father, ”Dad, what happened to the birdie?” His dad told him, ”Son, the bird died and went to heaven.” Then the boy asked, ”Did God throw him …
Přečíst celý »Sea Lion’s idea of Fun
Q: Why do sea lions go to Tupperware parties? A: To find a tight seal!
Přečíst celý »Scott LaRose: Angry T. Rexes
The T. Rexes were all angry. You know why? Because these huge muscular creatures with these big muscular legs and these tiny little hands! How would you feel, 60 million years never being able to masturbate? That is the real reason dinosaurs are extinct right there.
Přečíst celý »School Joke 3
As a pre-med student at Washington University in St. Louis, I had to take a difficult class in physics. One day our professor was discussing a particularly complicated concept. A student rudely interrupted to ask, “Why do we have to learn this stuff?” “To save lives.” The professor responded quickly …
Přečíst celý »School Joke 2
On the first day of college, the dean addressed the students, pointing out some of the rules: “The female dormitory will be out-of-bounds for all male students, and the male dormitory to the female students. Anybody caught breaking this rule will be fined $20 the first time. Anybody caught breaking …
Přečíst celý »School Joke 1
At a high school an English teacher is busy with work as a student approaches the teacher and asks when the test final test will be. She tells the whole class and a smart-ass jock raises his hand. “What if that day I just stayed home because I was sexually …
Přečíst celý »Safe Elephant Sex
How can you tell that elephants have been doing it in your garage? All your Hefty Bags are missing.
Přečíst celý »Running Blind
A policeman was directing traffic at a busy intersection when he observed a blind man and his seeing-eye dog waiting to cross.To his horror, he watched as the seeing-eye dog bolted across the street, dragging the blind man behind him.On the other side of the road, the man pulled out …
Přečíst celý »Rude Parrot on a Plane
A man goes to his seat on an airplane and finds a parrot in the seat next to him. Once in the air, the stewardess comes by, and when the man asks her for a coffee, the parrot squawks, “And get me a whiskey, you cow!”The flustered stewardess brings back …
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