Dirty Jokes

Fred, Bob and Mike visit a whorehouse.Fred comes out of the first bedroom and says, “She put a powdered donut on my d**k.”Bob comes out of the second bedroom and says, “She put a glazed donut on my d**k.”Mike comes out of the third bedroom, holding two dollars. Fred and …

At a high school an English teacher is busy with work as a student approaches the teacher and asks when the test final test will be. She tells the whole class and a smart-ass jock raises his hand. “What if that day I just stayed home because I was sexually …

Q: What aren’t blondes sexually active?A: Because they just lie there.

A man went over to his girl’s place for a little bit of nookie between the sheets. He presented her with three choices of condom — gold, silver, or bronze. “Silver,” she said. “Why not gold?” “Because I want you to come second for once!”

    A woman was at work when a man said, "Your hair smells nice."

This lady walks into her boss’s office one day and says, “Sir, I’d like to file a sexual harassment complaint.” Her boss says, “Well what’s your complaint?” She says, “My co-worker Joe said my hair smelled nice.” The boss says, “That’s really not sexual harassment.” The lady counters, “But, Joe’s …

Q: What do you get when you have 50 lesbians and 50 congressmen in one place?A: A roomful of people who don’t do dick.

A young woman goes to church and confesses her sins to the priest.“Oh, Father, last night my boyfriend made hot, passionate love to me seven times,” she says.The priest thinks about this long and hard and says, “Take seven lemons and squeeze the juice into a tall glass and drink …

Q: Why do some blondes only think about sex? A: They’re dirty blondes.

A young married couple maintains a strict sexual schedule. Every day, the husband and wife get home from work at 5 p.m. and have sex at 5:15 p.m.One day, the wife comes down with the flu and goes on antibiotics. The medicine kills all the germs, except for three, who …