Food Jokes

A Texan, a Russian and a New Yorker go to a restaurant in London. The waiter tells them, “Excuse me — if you were going to order the steak, I’m afraid there’s a shortage due to the mad cow disease.” The Texan says, “What’s a shortage?” The Russian says, “What’s …

A banana peel and a banana are robbing a store. “Don’t worry,” says the peel. “I’ve got you covered!”

Q: What did one cannibal say to the other while they were eating a clown? A: “Does this taste funny to you?”

Q: What do you call a 70s cookie band? A: OREO Speedwagon.

Why are oranges like bells? You can peel (peal) both of them.

How can you make a soup rich? Add 14 carrots (carats) to it.

What could you do if you were on a desert island without food or water? Open your watch: drink from the spring, and eat the sand which is (sandwiches) there.

If there were no food left, what could people do? Country people could eat their forest preserves and city people could have their traffic jams.

What do you get if you cross an alien and a hot drink ? Gravi-tea !

WIFE: The 2 things I cook best are meatloaf and apple pie. HUSBAND: Which is this?